I tested again today and yet another bfn. I said I wasn't going to let myself feel really down about it until like 16 dpo... I lied. I bawled today because by 12 dpo so many women have at least a faint bfp. I've been using ept digitals, and so I thought maybe it was super faint and the test just couldn't read it. So, I pried that damn test apart completely sure I'd see a faint second line on the test strip. Nope. Besides the control line, the damn strip was as white as winter snow.
Besides that, every "symptom" I was sure I had is gone. I feel great, and that has me so sad. At this point I just know I'm not pregnant. I'll test again at 14 dpo, just to be sure, but I honestly don't think it will be positive. As much as I said I wasn't getting my hopes up, I completely was. I mean, how can you not? It just feels like I have hit a wall, and there is no getting beyond it. After about two and a half years, it just feels like it is never going to happen.
So, I cried and my house is now spotless... I guess there is always next cycle...
There, I'm done whining.