Wednesday, December 7, 2011

A sigh of relief and a wtf??

Alex and I talked about the whole situation many many times, and I think we finally reached an understanding. There were lots of tears, a few raised voices, and realizations on both ends. It turns out we weren't being completely clear with each other.

He does want to wait a little bit, but not for as long or for the reasons that I thought. He wants to take about a year and really work on improving his woodworking and forging. He is hoping that in that year we will have the time to sell his creations, have me doula (for money, that is) and all around save the money. His thinking is that since there is this extra time where the situation isn't quite as dire, we can use it to be a little more financially prepared. He doesn't want to take out a loan for 10,000-20,000$ if we don't have to. He wants us to save as much as we can, and then take out a loan if we can't quite cover it.

While I'm still not thrilled with the wait, I can respect this. The thing that has me happiest is that if someone we know approaches us about a baby, he is perfectly happy to immediately take the steps towards adopting it. He says that if something works out that well, then we are meant to take those steps then. The way he was originally talking, it just seemed as if he saw an out and was taking it. As far I knew, this break could have been decades long, and that just wasn't acceptable. I'm really glad that we managed to work this out. In the mean time, we are going to continue trying naturally (or as naturally as possible), and maybe we'll "relax" enough ;)

As for still trying,  do you all remember Dr. S telling me not to continue any meds until we moved to ivf for my emotional stability blah blah blah? Should I follow that advice? Technically my usual PA, Ms. B, spoke with a different doctor and they decided I could continue femara as long as I still came in for scans. I would rather continue with that source of treatment. Even if Dr. S thinks nothing will change on femara, I know absolutely nothing will happen without it. I would like to continue with at least a glimmer of a hope. What do you think?

Now, for the wtf segment of today's show. Did you guys know there is a whole anti-adoption community?! Reading the stuff is crazy! Apparently couples looking to adopt are predators and just customers. Apparently the act is completely unnatural and damaging to the child. Some of the things I was reading were just ridiculous! Have you guys seen this? Thoughts?

1 comment:

  1. Wow, you sure have been through the ringer lately. I'm so sorry it's been so crazy, and an emotional roller coaster, but I'm very glad that you and Alex are talking and are somewhat on the same page now. This is such tough stuff, getting two people to agree on a path is huge!

    The anti-adoption community is scary strange! I'm an adoptee, and although things weren't perfect with my adoption, of course I'm thrilled that there is something called adoption! I don't get some of the feelings that people have, although I have to admit I'm strangely fascinated. My advice to you is stay as far away from those people as possible...